Drive In

When I finally made it to the drive in, everyone else was already there. No big shock. My friend had waited at the gates for me, and we made our way to find the rest of the group. My friend had known Todd for at least six years, the four guys had all been friends for a long time, and the two girlfriends there were long term. And then there was me, sober and in a close knit group of whom I knew one person. My socialization skills are sub-par at best, but that particular combo is my worst nightmare. I was visibly uncomfortable and jonesing for a whole lot of alcohol to make it better.

But in the midst of it all was Chris. Naturally, I sat near him. My friend later said that the two of us oozed sex to the point of filling a room with it whenever we were together. I suppose that first night wasn't much different. The movies were horrible, but the other females in the group were enjoying the hideous romantic comedy. I rolled my eyes and groaned right around the same time Chris did. I think my sheer and utter undisguised contempt for the movie was what really drew him to me.

He asked about my humongous elbow rug burn with a smirk. I said it was from falling over while playing a board game. His eyes twinkled as he challenged that story. I snorted, replied that I wished it had been for a good reason and that if I was going to make up a story, it wouldn't be as ridiculous as the truth that I had told. He asked if it hurt. I replied, "Like a bitch", he changed his sitting position and invited me to lean on him. I was a little slow figuring out what he meant, first leaning against his arm, but he placed me in the most comfortable position for me. I ended up sitting in between his legs, being supported by the front of his body. His friends all raised their eyebrows and looked at each other. After a few minutes I relaxed. Not all of Chris did. *smirk*

After the movies, we went to my regular bar. I don't even remember if anyone else came with us. I do remember his shock at the sheer amount of people in the bar who knew me by name, as in every single employee and at least half the patrons. I just remember desperately downing a few drinks, trying to relax. He took me to move my father's truck from the lot where I had parked earlier in the evening during the parade. For some reason my dad had specified the truck needed to be in his driveway overnight, even though he was on vacation.

Chris asked if I wanted to go watch a movie with him. I started to whine about all the movie watching, as I hate it, but decided it might be OK. Since Chris' parents were on vacation too, we went to their house instead of his apartment. He put on Jerry Maguire and we reclined together on the sofa in a slightly modified variation of our drive in position. He held me and played with my hair. Then we kissed, and it was time to go upstairs.

I silently freaked because I had had sex with Jay that morning and was under the mistaken impression that should I happen to get pregnant, a 24 hour difference would mean I wouldn't have to wonder who the daddy was. Uh huh. I'm smart. Whatever the case, I told him we would not be having sex that night, and he said that was OK, we'd have plenty of time, and asked about other limitations. Since I had never turned down anyone I wanted before, my other restrictions were nil. And then, it was on.

In a few days it will have been fourteen years since that night. This is the first time I remember that I have been able to choke back the bile that usually rises in my throat at the thought of him. It's hard to remember the decent beginning when the middle and the end burned the whole thing to ash.